he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
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I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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