you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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