It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
