Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Randomize
