Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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