found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
