i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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