My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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