You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
