he thought i was a dude.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
