batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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