Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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