white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
she told me i tasted like america
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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