Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My vagina just clenched in fear
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
