Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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