i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize