we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
