I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm always down for nudity.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
