hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
