i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
tell your sister to shave her snatch
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
