meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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