I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
