you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
