I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize