do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Randomize