After last night, I could never be a politician.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
