her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
