In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
tell me about the eggs
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