I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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