ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
