I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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