Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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