if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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