Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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