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What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
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