Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
