No awkward lesbian experiences without me
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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