My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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