ADVERTISEMENT

• (502): View more from Kentucky

  And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs

  Fav 41 1164 3752

  share tweet
  

• (703): View more from Virginia

  Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?

  Fav 4 2191 5467

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.

  Fav 18 7750 1324

  share tweet
  

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13

  Fav 7 1536 2788

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (316): View more from Kansas

  Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.

  Fav 25 787 1936

  share tweet
  

• (660): View more from Missouri

  I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.

  Fav 5 1479 900

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (518): View more from New York

  Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.

  Fav 3 678 939

  share tweet
  

• (423): View more from Tennessee

  People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.

  Fav 9 747 794

  share tweet
  

• (301): View more from Maryland

  What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested

  Fav 1 535 427

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night

  Fav 0 695 390

  share tweet
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho

  Fav 2 564 425

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (206): View more from Washington

  What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....

  Fav 1 48 20

  share tweet
  

• (804): View more from Virginia

  I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.

  Fav 1 20 55

  share tweet
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties

  Fav 1 50 8

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (207): View more from Maine

  I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.

  Fav 1 9 26

  share tweet
  

Randomize