Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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