Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(862): View more from New Jersey

my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.

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(862): my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around. http://tfl.nu/z3u8

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high

(808): View more from Hawaii

worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

nevermind....I'm on the way

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(814): dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high (808): worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave (814): nevermind....I'm on the way http://tfl.nu/dzeu

Replies (70) Good night (10121) Bad night (809)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.

(402): View more from Nebraska

Update, its a couple

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(402): On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho. (402): Update, its a couple http://tfl.nu/mrbp

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(201): View more from New Jersey

just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.

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(201): just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit. http://tfl.nu/jcis

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(914): View more from New York

Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS

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(914): Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS http://tfl.nu/w0yg

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(847): View more from Illinois

If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen

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(847): If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen http://tfl.nu/f9bs

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(505): View more from New Mexico

new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.

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(505): new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse. http://tfl.nu/qxpq

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(530): View more from California

i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome

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(530): i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome http://tfl.nu/b710

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(812): View more from Indiana

Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on

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(812): Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on http://tfl.nu/glb4

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(509): View more from Washington

I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.

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(509): I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning. http://tfl.nu/olim

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(770): View more from Georgia

I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.

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(770): I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time. http://tfl.nu/k05m

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(901): View more from Tennessee

oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.

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(901): oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home. http://tfl.nu/ixn7

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(615): View more from Tennessee

We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.

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(615): We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably. http://tfl.nu/c0bc

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(509): View more from Washington

So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?

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(509): So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh? http://tfl.nu/gcnr

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(303): View more from Colorado

Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat

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(303): Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat http://tfl.nu/1yef

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