Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.