i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
