so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
