what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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