i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
