I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
