I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
