I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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