Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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