We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
it glows. i had to have it.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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