Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
